Whatever you say,

does it really matter?

As Carlos Mencia would say “Dee dee dee!”

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Awhile back, I was watching Oprah.  For the record, I just happened to turn it on.  I never “tune” in to watch her.  Anywho, I was watching Oprah. The discussion was about bra sizes and how 70% of women are wearing the wrong size.  I for one, know for a fact, I am not wearing the right size.  She had expert bra “measurers” from Nordstrom because apparently anywhere else you go, they measure you all wrong.  I told myself several months ago that I would go to Nordstrom to see what size I am actually suppose to be wearing.  NEVER DID!  Then on Wednesday, I am having a conversation with a friend who just got hired at Victoria Secret and we began talking about bras.  I must be obsessed with wanting to know my “real” size. 

All the reasons why I know I am NOT wearing the right size:
1.  always having to adjust the straps
2.  always having to adjust in general
3.  always having to tuck
4.  always having the back strap rise to high
5.  and don’t get me started on the spillage

So, on my way home I decide, THIS IS IT!  I am driving to Nordstrom and going to get this over with.  I step into the dressing room, take off my scrub top.  And this is the conversation that occurred between me and the nice Nordstrom Associate:

Associate: “What size have you been wearing?”
Me: “A 36DD but I know it’s not the right size.”
Associate: “Well obviously it’s not the right size because you are falling out of the one you have on.”
Me thinking to myself : “I know this.  Why do you think I am here?”  I smiled and raised my arms.  I began to feel the measuring tape around my back and she started making these puzzled looks.  She adjusted the measuring tape over my breasts and took another measurement.  Please just tell me already.  Come on!  The anticipation was killing me!
Associate: “Well you are definitely a 34 TRIPLE D.”
Me: “What? SHUT UP! You are kidding me, right?”
Associate with a smile: “Nope.  You are a 34DDD.”
I think I said a few more “shut ups” and then managed to say: “Thank you so much for your time.”

I nearly fainted when I walked out of the dressing room.  After all these years of wearing a DD, I should have been in a DDD.  MY GOD!  I didn’t think they were THAT big!  How could they be so HUGE when I have lost 25lbs?  My poor little puppies or should I say hounds.  I definitely am bringing new meaning to “Release the hounds!”

I was so devastated.  I walked out without buying a bra.  I am dreading the day when I will actually buy a DDD bra!

sniff, sniff


Author: Michelle

Just a woman finally finding herself!

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