Whatever you say,

does it really matter?

A Change Not Involving Weight Loss

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Because we hard on ourselves to be an “ideal weight.”
Because the media shows a thin model as ideal.
Because the media tells you you’re overweight or obese.
Because the BMI scale is ridiculous.
Because Photoshop exists.
Because you have low self-esteem.
Because peer pressure is inevitable.
Because people judge.

I have never considered myself “fat,” “overweight,” “chunky,” “plump,” “large,” “chubby,” or whatever word you choose to describe your weight.  I always fluctuate 10 lbs up or down and I am fine with that.  One day, I went to the doctor, was weighed and inserted on the lovely BMI scale.  Guess what?  I was one…ONE…pound away from being overweight. I got the stern warning I “need to watch it” or “lose some weight.” That dang BMI scale is ridiculous.  Here how ridiculous it is:

I can weigh 132 lbs at my top weight (133 lbs makes me overweight)
I can weigh 98 lbs at my low weight (97 lbs makes me under weight).

Do those numbers look right to you?  Ninety eight pounds!!!  This is what 98 lbs looks like!


Oh let me count my ribs and other bones I can see.  This is more like an eating disorder than a healthy, ideal weight the media keeps pushing on us.  Ideal according to who?  Who are these people?  Who is making us so crazy with being overweight?  I even have a scale at home that tells me I am overweight every time I weigh myself!  Damn thing doesn’t work properly.  No, seriously!  It doesn’t.  No matter how much I lose, I am always the same percentage of body fat.  But when I gain weight, it goes up.  It’s ridiculous just like the BMI scale.  Built in BMI scales at home are even worse.  So do me a favor, ignore the overweight part of the BMI scale.  See for yourself  here.  Play with weight to see how low you can go before hitting 18.9 and how high to reach 25.  It’s a very large range.  Side note:   Obesity is a serious concern which has many negative effects on your health.  I am discussing being “overweight” not obese.

Yes, I am on a wellness journey. Yes, it happens to include weight loss.  But my reasons for weight loss is not because I am “almost” overweight (thank you BMI scale).  Not for any reasons drilled in our heads throughout the day, everyday.  My reasons are simple: for my future husband and children.  What better reason than that?  I can’t think of one.  It’s simple and white picket fence ideal: I want to be a mother!  I want to run, play and most importantly be alive and present with my husband and children.

You see, I was blessed with large breasts, as well as ALL THE WOMEN in my family.  In addition to large breasts, I suffer from horrible back pain (upper but especially lower) from a previous work injury and surgery.  When I went to the doctor to complain, he and two specialists responded…drum roll please…”Lose weight.”    Yes, you read that right.  Lose weight was the end all cure for my back pain.  I AM NOT OVERWEIGHT!  I JUST HAVE LARGE BREASTS is what I wanted to scream.  With a  little motivation and inspiration from Jared, I aim to: budge the weight in my breasts to alleviate back pain and strengthen my lower back and abs in order to carry my children in-utero and always.  I am sure many of you are sitting there screaming at your screen saying, “Get a breast reduction.”   I will if my weight loss doesn’t alleviate my back pain AFTER I have children NOT before.

Instead of focusing on less of something, let’s add more.  More of anything that makes you feel good, whole, relaxed, and not guilty.   For one moment in time, let’s step away from being so hard on ourselves, from the scales, media and from the pressure.  There are so many things we can change about ourselves that don’t involve weight loss and MindBodyGreen couldn’t have said it better.

Continuing the journey…


Author: Michelle

Just a woman finally finding herself!

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